I AM ABOUT TO...

Cancel my MYSPACE account.  Do people still use that thing?  Apparently they do cause my profile had thousands of views.  More people probably have read my MYSPACE page than actually read this thing.  Pathetic.  Perhaps all of the people that use Myspace are just younger than me.  I hadn't signed on to it in FOREVER.  A few minutes ago I logged on and had friend requests out the WAZOO from people I don't know telling me to listen to their music, come to their art shows, and a few teeny boppers saying they loved my profile pic.  Fucking Nutjobs.

I was thinking, "What do I need this for?"  I mean, I have a FACEBOOK account, which seems to be more than enough.  I prefer FB because there isn't much of a hassle with it.  Not much spam.  Your friends are actually, your friends.  Fewer creeps lurking and it's a great platform for my writing.  Every time I've ever logged into MYSPACE to check out someone's page, whatever song they have blasting on their profile annoys the shit out of me.  I just heard mine, which is super out-dated, but still awesome (Black Sandals by SIA).  Maybe I'm just being a judgmental dickwad and should post my blogs on MI ESPACIO as well.  We'll see.  Wait a minute... What the hell am I saying?  I thought I was canceling this bloody thing!  I believe I just convinced myself to keep it.  Fuck.  What a loser.

Anyway, the reason for this entry was to show all of you what I wrote about myself in the "ABOUT ME" section of my Myspace profile.  I guess it was my first BLOG entry if you will.  I hope you get a kick out of it... Cause I sure as hell just did.

About me: 

What you see is not what you get.  It dawned on me recently that there are a few things I have to come to terms with in order to move forward.

1.) My lazy eye may or may not become a distraction.

2.) Being a pirate is not a very lucrative profession.

3.) I'm not Jewish, or Black.

4.) It's not okay to be uninsured.

5.) Catholic priests are an enigma.

6.) Security is an illusion.

7.) Will really got married.

8.) Dying old, alone, and in the dark is a strong possibility for me.

9.) People that hate me for my brutal honesty better take a number.

10.) Waite graduated from college.

11.) It's impossible to have a conversation with someone in a full Knight suit and keep a straight face.

12.) My Father is a TEAMSTER and I'm fucking proud of it.

13.) Most people are sheep... They should read more.

14.) I've never been ice skating.

15.) The people who bite their fingernails and smoke cigarettes incessantly aren't really affecting my daily routine.

16.) Mormons are some brave mother fuckers.

17.) Apparently being a loser is cool.

18.) Just because I listen to sappy music and British pop doesn't make me gay or depressed... I think?

19.) "THE BREAK UP" is the saddest movie I've ever seen.

20.) People will do almost anything to get attention and then it all seems so clear.

21.) I realize that everyone who lives will someday die, and die alone.

22.) It's legal for MEN to wear JEAN SHORTS... And I just don't get it.

23.) Realizing how much of a loser/peasant I am for writing all of this bullshit and actually having one of these savvy self promotional friend things... Then wiping my brow in relief knowing you just read it... And wasted 60 seconds of your life.

And as a little bonus... This was my "Who I'd like to meet" section:

My Mother and Father in their PRIME... CIRCA 1963.  Someone who just gets it.  A nice girl.  Maybe LT on a BENDER back in the 80's sometime after the Giants won the Super Bowl or Joe Namath back when it was still cool to be an alcoholic and the JETS were nasty.  Someone who knows when to be quiet and when to tell me when to be quiet.  My friends from the TERRACE... Back on the tracks for an adventure sometime in the early 90's.

How do you like them apples?  I'm officially a joker.